Hiya guys! I know it’s been a hot minute since I’ve posted and I let up on the momentum of posting a bit, but I have a super important message this time. Not that the other ones weren’t important, they definitely were. But this one I think is important for right now.
It’s no secret that everyone’s kind of torn up about the state of the world right now. It’s entirely true and valid because everyday we see the same headlines that read ‘Coronavirus Update” along with a list of new restrictions. It gets heavy out there. I’m fortunate enough to live with a beautiful view of my city, but sometimes I look at it and I remember that I should be there right now.
Sometimes I feel like it’s a tease having it so close, and I can’t even walk around in it right now. It’s a strange combination of occasional hope and sadness. I can look at my city and think, “I’ll be back in no time!” and sometimes it’s more of a “it feels like I’ll never get to go back”. I won’t let that happen, and I know I will in fact get back! It sets in sometimes that my college days are sort of over too and that also feels wild. The memories I made in college are some that I’ll never forget. I became my own person and I started a journey into discovering who I want to be. I met people that have changed my life and I’m so appreciative that my path crossed with theirs. Maybe it was quick, or maybe it lasted all four years, I’m grateful for every single person I met, and every single lesson I learned. A great friend of mine once told me that everyone you meet comes into your life for a reason, season, or lifetime. Maybe you don’t know which is which sometimes, but I know some of the relationships and connections I’ve made are those that’ll last a lifetime. Even if all of these weren’t meant to be lifelong connections, I learned from them and I can’t ask for anything more than that. If you’re a student, recent grad, or even nowhere near your college days, reach out to those you still talk to from college. Or if you don’t keep in touch with your college pals, talk to someone that you know is there for your lifetime ride. I’m sure they’ve impacted your life in some form or another. I learned so much more in my college days than anyone could have ever told me. I’ve said this before, but no virus will take away my memories or the moments that mean the most to me. When I think of these things, my heart feels full again.
These past few weeks have been hard, I’m not going to lie. It was hard for me to feel hopeful and it’s easy enough to sit here and say “look on the bright side”, but I want to mean it. As someone who needs social interactions daily, isolation feels heavy. I get up, I work on my remote school work, I sit and do nothing. The next day comes and I do it all over again. It feels like nothing. What’s the point? It’s okay to hit a low, and be down sometimes. I know this feeling will pass, and I have to remind myself of that. One of my professors actually encouraged us to hit that pause button on our lives if we needed to. I always look forward to her Zoom class, she’s always greeting us with a smile and good spirits. So sort of in the same sense, I encourage anyone who needs to, to do the same. I sort of did that without realizing it, and here we are almost over a month into quarantine.
Another quick little story for you…. Alright, about to put myself on blast here (not mad about it!), but there is something that I do every week that takes my mind off of everything, and that’s when things started to look up for me. On Saturday nights, me and three friends do a Google Hangout session and we play Dungeons and Dragons for about five- six hours. Yes, I’m a nerd, I get it. But getting to sit down with my friends (virtually of course), and collectively play this game, and create this story together, allows me to step out of the unfortunate reality that we’re currently living in. I’m no expert, I’ve only played a handful of times, but I do know that if you have any kind of imagination, you might just find this to be fun too. It’s not all serious, we make so many jokes during our session that it’s like we’re not all in different states. Literally all four of us are in completely different states, some even in different time zones. If you don’t know how the game works, essentially it’s group storytelling in a world that you create, with characters that you get to live through and everything is dictated by different actions and the rolls of dice. There’s different motivations and situations to work through, and there’s so much fun to be had in between. Now I know what you’re thinking, this is a hyper specific thing and not everyone will enjoy this. You’re right! That’s true! But it was a point of getting to connect and do something that allowed me to step out of the real world for two seconds, and use my imagination and creativity besides just on paper. After these weeks that feel so hard to get through, I finally started to feel better. The point here is this: it doesn’t matter what it is, but let yourself step outside the real world if you can. Step outside and allow yourself to forget for two seconds. It doesn’t have to be some big elaborate thing, and it definitely doesn’t have to be a role playing dice game, but it can be. It can be anything. Anything that’ll allow yourself to be able to go a few hours or so without seeing or hearing the word Covid-19.
So I guess my overall message this time is it’s okay if you fall during this. It’s okay to be down, I spent some time down too. More time than I would have liked really... Just don’t forget to get back up again. You’re allowed to take all the time you need to get back up, and maybe you don’t want to necessarily get back up yet-- that’s fine. But don’t stay down forever. I didn’t think I was even ready to get back up just yet. Playing games with my friends was the start of realizing that I actually wanted to get up. You definitely have to want to get back up before you can start the climb. Allow yourself to take some time. You deserve it. You deserve to rise, don’t forget that!
As always, I’m gonna leave you with some song lyrics. Music is my thing and I love some good dramatic lyrics to end with…
“New York, you’re perfect. Don’t, please don’t change a thing…….. New York, I love you, but you’re freaking me out. New York, I love you, but you’re bringing me down...” (New York, I Love You but You’re Bringing Me Down by LCD Soundsystem)
Stand Clear Of The Closing Doors Please,
Lex